Human Design can be an amazing tool to examine and improve any relationship in your life. We’ll go over 3 ways to improve your relationships with human design: know and understand yours and your significant others human design type, find out where the gifts and pitfalls lie in your human design profile lines, and last but not least, learn how undefined centers in your human design chart are running the show in your relationships.
This topic is so juicy for me!
I think that one of my favourite things about Human Design is how it can be used to improve relationships. Whether they are difficult or stable, there’s always room for improvement!
As with all things Human Design, there are many ways to interpret the meanings and aspects of the chart. Each and every one of us lives from some version (or combination of) our unique blueprint. There’s the shadow side, the regular everyday, and the highest expression. There are also 6 different profile lines that will affect each of the 64 gates differently. That’s a whole lot of variables to consider!
Add to the mix another person’s blueprint, and it’s GAME ON.
In this post, I’ll unpack some of the higher level things to consider in your relationship with others. Just know that this is the tip of the iceberg and that a Human Design Relationship reading is an excellent investment in any relationship that you’d love to enjoy for as long as you’re in it. 😌
This is key to any and every relationship that you will have, including the relationship you have with yourself! If you don’t have your Human Design chart, you can print it here for free.
Your Human Design chart will tell you your type and strategy. Here’s a brief summary of each of the human design types.
Manifestor Human Design: Manifestors initiate. They are the only Human Design type that is designed to do so. Manifestors are powerful beings. People are often repelled by Manifestors as their aura tends to be more closed and uninviting. This is because they don’t NEED people to get things done. Manifestors make up about 11% of the population.
Generator Human Design: Generators respond to life around them. They are not designed to initiate although they will have been conditioned, throughout their lives, to do so. Generator types have an open and enveloping aura. They take everything in because they are meant to be responding to the world around them. Generators make up about 37% of the population.
Manifesting Generator Human Design: The Manifesting Generator is, for all intents and purposes, a Generator. Many Human Design coaches consider the Manifesting Generator a type on its own but it’s really and truly a Generator type therefore, the Manifesting Generator is here to live in response to life around them. Manifesting Generators make up about 33% of the population.
Projector Human Design: Projectors wait to be recognized and/or invited. That is, when they are living according to their strategy, they do. Projectors have a focused and penetrating aura. Projectors make up about 20% of the population.
Reflector Human Design: Reflectors are karmic mirrors. They are here to reflect the health of their communities. It is said that Reflectors have a sampling aura in that they are sampling the happenings in the community to reflect it back. Reflectors make up about 1% of the population.
Following your Human Design strategy makes everything easier, including your relationships. It doesn’t matter if it’s a relationship with your child, your parent, your partner, your spouse, your business associates, or your friends. Having a handle on your own type and how you’re uniquely meant to show up in the world is a game changer. When you can understand the other person’s type and strategy, that opens up a whole new world.
Understanding the ‘highlight reel’ of how each of the Human Design types shows up in relationship can be a powerful tool to have in your back pocket.
Manifestors don’t need people. They have a closed and repelling aura. This does not mean that they are repelling! It means that they have a vibe about them that kind of pushes others away, subconsciously. It’s not personal. Remember, they don’t NEED people!
I have a really good friend who’s a Manifestor. It’s not uncommon for me to feel like she doesn’t really want anything to do with me from time to time. I need to remind myself that this is her way. She initiates and I respond, so I know that when she does send me a message or wants to get together for a coffee, it’s a sincere invitation. She’s just not built to need to be surrounded by others as she’s self directed and fine on her own.
Ah Generators (and Manifesting Generators) with their big enveloping aura. Generator types want to consume everything, and that includes you 💙 Generators need things to respond to with yes or no questions. If you’d like to take your Generator partner on a date, please don’t open by asking “What would you like to do tonight?” That’s a recipe for a frustrating, often hours long, discussion. Instead, ask a series of yes or no questions like this;
Asking questions in this way will engage the sacral motor in your Generator partner and they’ll FEEL the answer in their body. Try this the next time you’d like an answer from a Generator in your life.
Everything about Generators applies here to Manifesting Generators. Remember that Manifesting Generators ARE Generators in Human Design.
There are a few things to keep in mind about your Mani-Gen though. Let’s look at this one through the lens of the parent – child relationship, assuming that the child is the Manifesting Generator. First, Godspeed to the parent 🤣
Manifesting Generators are busy. They multitask, always. They will not read your instructions. They will miss details. They will often frustrate you to no end with their incessant need to be busy.
Manifesting Generators have A LOT of energy to burn. If you notice that your Mani Gen child is frustrated, or hyperactive, or not sleeping well, take them for a run. Seriously. Get that kid outside and get them burning sacral energy! It will be the biggest game changer for you and for the child.
Another thing to keep in mind is that Manifesting Generators DO have the non-verbal, creative flow of the Manifestor. Often, they’ll be so engrossed in something (especially if they have the 34/20 channel defined) that they cannot hear you speak. This is not selective hearing. They probably are so engrossed that they don’t even know you’re there!
When possible, let them be.
They need to be in touch with this creative flow to feel fulfilled.
They don’t want your help either. Just stay out of the way. Actually, that’s a good motto for anyone in a relationship with a Mani-Gen. Just stay out of their way. 🤣
Projectors are wise beings. They are here to spiritually hold the potential of the planet. They are our guides. The thing is, they have projected energy fields that are focused and absorbing. They need to wait for the invitation; be it to share an opinion, to join a group, to attend a gathering, to go on a date, to get married, to move in with someone. Their souls light up when invited.
If you love a Projector, take this into consideration. Invite them to share their thoughts. Invite them to come sit a while. Invite them to dinner. Invite them to bed. Invite them to clean their mess up.
Recognize your Projector as often as you can. You’ll be glad you did.
Reflectors mirror the health of their communities. They have an entirely open design so they absorb and amplify the energies of others around them.
Reflectors need time alone to allow this energy to dissipate. They also need to talk. A LOT.
The best gift – actually, make that gifts that you can give your Reflector friend are time and space to talk.
Listen to your Reflector friend, partner or child. They don’t need you to say anything. They simply need a sounding board.
Your Reflector friend also requires time alone. Let this be ok.
You may be wondering what this has to do with relationships. Trust me when I say that this is a BIG deal to understand if you are in a relationship with someone who doesn’t share your Human Design type.
People with an undefined or open Sacral Center; Manifestors, Reflectors, and Projectors, really need to sleep alone. This is because throughout the course of the day, they have absorbed a lot of Sacral energy from those around them and they need to be able to allow it to dissipate. The last thing your non-sacral partner needs is to be conditioned while they sleep!
This goes for kids too. Your non-sacral child will not sleep well at parties, sleepovers, sharing a room with a sibling, etc. If possible, limit these circumstances so that they can rest well.
There are 6 profile lines in Human Design. They will definitely influence relationships. Your profile will be listed on your Human Design chart. It’s derived from the profile lines of your conscious Sun and Earth and your unconscious Sun and Earth.
The profile lines absolutely affect how you and your partner show up in your relationship! It’s said that your profile is the character you play in the movie of your life.
These are the 6 Human Design Profile lines and their traits. If you have charts of people you’re in relationship with, check out their profiles and your own and see where there could be gifts and pitfalls between them.
The first three lines (Lines 1-3) are intrapersonal roles. They are mostly focused on the self.
The second three lines (Lines 4-6) are interpersonal roles. They are mostly focused outside of self.
Motto: ‘The more I know, the less I have to fear!’
Line 1 profiles need to research and investigate. They need to go down every rabbit hole in order to understand the foundation and/or the way things work so that they feel safe and secure.
A feeling of inferiority is the worst thing for a first line profile. They need to know that they know that they know!
Motto: ‘I am ready for the unknowable, whatever that may be.’
Line 2 profiles have a natural and innate talent for what it is that they do. If you ask them, they have no idea how it is that they do what they do, it comes so naturally that they often don’t see it as a gift, even though those around them do.
The second line profile is self-contained, hence the name hermit.
The thing that’s interesting about second line profiles though, is that they will naturally be called out (energetically) to share what they know when the time is right and/or they will be called into community.
Motto: ‘There are no mistakes!’
Line 3 profiles have tenacity and grit! They are here to fully experience life and in fact, they MUST experience everything for themselves as this is how they learn what they’re here to learn.
Third line profiles are often led to believe that they are trying too many things and making too many mistakes but this is not the case. It is the only way for them to learn their lessons. For the third line profile, it’s all about discovery and mutation or change.
Motto: ‘My network finds me when I’m living my strategy and authority.’
Line 4 is deeply influential in the community. He/she builds community, or a strong network, often without being aware that this is a gift.
The line four moves from foundation to foundation. This is not someone who will quit their job on a whim without a back-up plan (and maybe even a back-up plan to the back-up plan!)
The line 5 is all about projection. It is the karmic mirror for all who encounter it. It’s always moving towards the other. The aura of the 5th line not only invites others to project onto it, it may project solutions onto others whether asked for or not.
Often, 5th line profiles are misunderstood (who wants their karma reflected back to them after all?) and can feel isolated, alone, or like a misfit.
Line 6 profiles go through 3 distinct life phases.
From 0-30 is really a third line phase – all about experiencing life and experimenting, making all of the ‘mistakes’. From 30-50 is all about integrating the lessons of the early years (we call this on the roof). From 60 (we call this off the roof) it’s all about becoming a role model to the collective, sharing your life’s lessons and your wisdom.
Six line profiles are often seen as aloof.
There can be conflict anywhere and for any number of reasons. Remember that this post is a high level look at some of the places this can exist, through the lens of Human Design.
Often, between Profile lines 3 and 4, there can be some angst.
Line 4 doesn’t like for things to change. They want to move from one foundation to another. They want to, they NEED to, feel solid. Line 3 wants constant change. They don’t require a foundation. They want to, they NEED to, experience ALL of the things! They want to make all of the ‘mistakes’ themselves so that they can learn through experience.
Profile Lines 2 and 5 are both projected lines. Both hold karma and can be mirroring energies. Often, this doesn’t quite jive in relationships.
Ra Uru Hu (Human Design founder) taught us that our open centers are where we ‘go to school.’ There are many lessons to be learned through openness and this will often be played out in relationships.
Look at your own Human Design chart. Do you have gates that are defined in centers that are undefined? These themes will play out in relationships, throughout your lifetime.
When we look at the Human Design centers, there are 4 in particular that will perhaps have a stronger influence than the others. That’s not to say that ALL centers don’t play a part in relationship dynamics. It’s just that these 4 pack a bit more of a punch.
The G center or Identity Center is the center for lovability and direction in Human Design. People who have this center undefined will always question their lovability. Always. In addition to this, 4 of the 10 gates of love in the Human Design chart reside here, in the G center. We see gates of Self Love, Universal Love, Love of Humanity, and Love of the Body. Just think how these messages alone would play out in relationships!
Our open centers not only hold our life lessons, they are where we are most prone to being conditioned by others. This starts from the moment that we take our first breath. In open centers, we will take on energy from others and we will amplify it, so it always feels bigger for us.
Let’s say, for example, you have gate 46 defined and hanging in your open G center. This gate will always be subconsciously looking for its partner, the gate of commitment and devotion, gate 29. You’ll electromagnetically be drawing people with this gate into your field. Gate 46 is about love of the body. This is a theme that will play out for you in your relationships, because it’s how you are meant to learn your lessons.
Can I just say here how much I hate that the Ego gets a bad wrap? Especially in the spiritual community. The Ego is not bad. It’s just a part of the equation that is you!
If you have a defined Ego or Will center, you are definitely in the minority as only about ⅛ of the population has their Ego center defined.
When this center is undefined, it is a BEAST that can quickly take over and run the show of your life, especially in relationships. I have a lot of experience with this as my Will center is undefined and extremely conditioned (as they all are).
The undefined will center is always trying to prove itself.
➡️ Trying to prove it’s better
➡️ Trying to prove it’s smarter
➡️ Trying to prove it’s worthy
➡️ Trying to prove it’s love ➡️ Seeking validation from anywhere and everywhere.
It is a TRIP this undefined Will center!!
Gate 40 is one of the Love Gates in the Human Design chart. This one is all about Tribal love and keeping the tribe resourced. Electromagnetically, if this gate is defined in an open Will center, it will always be looking for gate 37 – the gate of community and friendship.
You can see how this need to prove itself would/could become problematic in relationships. No judgment here. We do this subconsciously and because we’ve been conditioned to do so. If you have an undefined Will center, you have nothing to prove. When you find yourself trying to prove something to yourself or someone else, take a big, deep breath and remind yourself “I have nothing to prove.”
Ah the Spleen Center.
In Human Design, the Spleen is the fear center and the intuitive center in the bodygraph.
The conditioned message of the open spleen is holding onto things for longer than it should. This could mean holding onto relationships that you know you need to step away from, holding onto material things, holding onto outdated systems, it all lives here.
If this center is undefined for you, ask yourself where you’re holding onto things for longer than you should.
This is also the fear center in the Human Design chart. 2 of the Gates of Love live here, in the Spleen Center. Gate 44 is the gate of alertness in Human Design. It’s all about having an instinctual awareness for the talents and potential of others. Some call it the gate of the Personnel Manager. The underlying fear of the 44th gate is all about the past catching up to you. In relationships, the person with the undefined spleen will amplify this fear and it may show up when you least expect it.
Gate 28 is said to be the Gate of Struggle. It too lives in the Spleen center. Gate 28 is always trying to find purpose. If it’s a hanging gate (without the 38 defined) it will struggle and often wonder what is worth fighting for – this could include relationships.
The underlying fear of gate 28 is that there is no purpose to life. It will often take great risks in the pursuit of purpose.
Other fears that live in the Spleen center include fear of inadequacy (48), fear of the future (57), fear of responsibility (50), fear of failure (32), fear of judgment and/or authority (18).
Fear is a monster that can consume relationships if left unchecked. Remember that in the open Spleen, these fears will be amplified and may show up at the most unpredictable times.
If you have gates that are defined in your open spleen, you are here to learn their lessons through your relationships. That’s just the way it is.
The biggest question you’re going to ask yourself with your open spleen though, is this; “Am I holding on longer than I should?”
People with a defined Emotional Solar Plexus are the people who are meant to be emotional. It’s hardwired into them. As someone with a defined Emotional Solar Plexus, I can tell you that there is A LOT of conditioning around this for me. While we often think of conditioning happening in our openness, it does happen through our definition as well.
People with an undefined Emotional Solar Plexus are NOT meant to be emotional but remember that in the openness, things are not only absorbed, they are amplified.
This is a big deal in relationships because if one of you has a defined ESP and the other an undefined ESP, one of you is deeply emotional and one of you is amplifying that emotion – always.
My husband and I have this dynamic. In his openness, he amplifies my emotions by at least 100. He has no way to filter them through his design. They truly all feel big to him. If you were standing in front of me, you could see my hands talking, saying “If I’m feeling something a teeny, tiny bit, he will feel it 10 times stronger”. Something can literally not be bothering me at all, but he will feel, in his body, like it is a big fat hairy deal.
It used to drive us crazy until we understood each of our designs. Now we can simply acknowledge that he is soaking up the emotion and break our auras apart for a wee while. The biggest question you can ask yourself, if you have an open Emotional Solar Plexus is “Is this mine?” If the answer is no, carry on as you were. Understand that you are simply filtering an emotion from someone else – be it in a relationship, a coffee shop, a crowded mall, or a party – this is what you will do! Give yourself the gift of being a sieve and not a sponge 💙
This is really just a glance into the Human Design chart as it pertains to your relationships. There are so many places we could look for support in this area, however, if we keep it simple, we’d look to these 3 things to improve your relationships- Type and Strategy, Open vs Defined Centers, Profile.
When you’re ready to dive into a relationship in your own life, be it with your child, parent, sibling, co-worker, employee, business or romantic partner, you can book a Human Design Relationship Reading here.
This reading provides an in depth look into each of your charts separately and then the composite chart that you form together. We take a look at where you’re conditioning each other, and how to stop this (to the best of your ability), the gifts of your designs in partnership, how to accept and honour each other’s needs, and more. This truly is one of the best gifts that you can give any relationship in your life.
When you’re ready, here are some of the ways that we can connect.
Book a Human Design reading with me here.
Join my Group Coaching Program here.
Sign up for my newsletter here.
The Human Design Membership! Learn all about Human Design in a supportive community space. Just $39/month. Opening Soon!
Check out the next Human Design Happy Hour here!
get your Guide
Uncover your business's unique identity, your driving force, your inherent genius, your overarching vision, and more! It's all in your Human Design chart. Learn where to find it.
Sign up here
It's a blueprint of your soul and your personality that is your secret weapon for decision making, relationships, health, finances, and everything else in life!
get your Guide
Discover the hidden health pitfalls in your human design chart. What style of eating is best for you? Why do you have trouble sleeping? Thyroid issues? It's in your chart!
get your ebook
'Think and Grow Rich' is a staple in the self help industry. Almost 100 years later, the 17 Success Principles still hold true. Join me on a journey through these principles with the insight of Human Design.