This has been an odd Mother’s Day for me. The only “child” at home today is Reggie – my 9-month-old dashador. Even my husband is working today. I’ve done some things that I’ve been neglecting for a while such as:
- took a nap!
- cleaned and organized my cupboards and freezer
- organized things for a yard sale
- cleaned the garage
- returned the empties to The Beer Store (and got $26.40 back!)
Ok, if I’m being totally honest with you, I also ate chips and dip and Mike’s Hard Lemonade for lunch!
All of this alone time has given me time to ponder motherhood and what it’s meant to me.
I’ve been a mom for longer than I wasn’t one. My first child, Andrea Grace was born 3 weeks before my 17th birthday and she’s perfect. It’s true what they say about the first child having to carve the path for the others but we all made it through and I’m so glad that she came into my life when and how she did. You see, I firmly believe that we are where we are because it’s where we’re supposed to be.
Even when we’re in the middle of something that’s less than ideal, it’s a necessary part of our journey. I wouldn’t have ended up where I am now if not for where I’ve been. Our Emily came along 4 1/2 years later and brought a whole new perspective to our lives. The girls are so different – both spectacular in their own ways. Andrea is a force – headstrong, knows what she wants, and doesn’t let anything stop her. She has channelled her gifts and strengths beautifully. Emily is the kindest person that I know. She is brilliant and determined. She’s gentler, because she’s had to be. As the middle child, she was the buffer between 2 stronger personalities, for many years.
22 months after Emily was born came the shock of our lives- Mr. Samuel. I remember laying on the ultrasound table and the technician telling us that I was carrying a boy. I looked at Pete and said, “What am I going to do with a BOY?” Well, thank God that I got one because he’s pretty darned awesome. It’s an entirely different world, communicating with a boy, especially because I never was one! It’s true what they say about mothers and boys. Samuel lights up my world and there’s a special place in my heart just for that boy who is soft on the inside, but difficult on the outside at times! He’s got his dad’s sense of humour and he uses it well. He’s sensible and strong with a fragile heart that he tries to hide.
As my children are making their way in the world (Samuel and Andrea are in Saskatchewan and Em is working today) I will probably have many more Mother’s Days like this one. It’s not so bad. I used to think that it was odd when the “older” mothers that I worked with would say “As long as they call, it’s ok. There’s nothing like that phone call.” Now I know that it’s true. Just to hear their voices and chat for a while will make my day.
I am thankful for all 3 of my children. From the moment that each of them came into my life, they have been a gift to me. They’ve taught me things about myself that I never could have learned without being their mom and each child has taught me completely different things. When I think of who I was 26 years ago when Andrea was born, compared to who I am now, I owe a lot of it to them. They’ve continued to make me re-examine my beliefs, my strengths, my weaknesses, my talents, and my shortcomings, many times all in the same day! I’ve grown in ways, as their mom, that I wouldn’t have otherwise. Today, as every day, I am grateful that I have been given the privilege to be ‘Mom’ to these beautiful people. They are my mark on the world and I am proud.
I’ll leave you with my favourite quote about mother’s day and motherhood by Elizabeth Stone: “Making the decision to have a child – it is momentous. It is to decide forever to have your heart go walking around outside of your body.”
And that’s the truth!
Happy Mother’s Day!